Job Loss Also Puts End to Affair

DEAR ABBY: Back in 2013, a co-worker, “Jamie,” and I fell in love. Both of us were married to other people, but everything felt perfect. It was a feeling I never had for anyone in my life before. Three years later, I lost my job. The day I was terminated, my wife found out I had been cheating, so I ended the affair.

I have found full-time work and I’m still married, but I’m not in love with my wife like I am with Jamie. I have tried to stay in contact with her to prove to her that I’m a better man, with little success. She told me I was her only love, but I broke her heart.

She doesn’t want to see me, even after several years of my trying to prove that I am the man she fell in love with. Her husband doesn’t know anything. She’s afraid I may break it off again. Should I continue pursuing her or give up and move on? I thought I could handle it on my own, but I need some advice. — MISSING HER IN ONTARIO, CANADA

DEAR MISSING HER: If you and Jamie really loved each other, you would no longer be married to your spouses. Having been dumped by you once, your former lover has a point. Give up and move on and you will save yourself, your wife, Jamie and her husband a lot of pain.

DEAR ABBY: I’m a pediatric RN at a large hospital. Sadly, I have seen too many young children die. I have learned to keep a professional distance, so that I can take care of the children and their families. I never give out my phone number, social media or email address, and I try not to let the parents ever see my struggle. But every once and a while, I can’t help caring beyond “professional.”

We just lost a beautiful little one who had spent a year and a half receiving care off and on in the hospital, and I’m heartbroken. The family has asked for nurses and doctors to attend the funeral, and I really want to. But how do I explain why I go to some funerals and not others? — HEARTBROKEN ONCE AGAIN

DEAR HEARTBROKEN: You don’t have to explain. I can’t imagine anyone actually counting the number of funerals/memorials you attend and asking a question like that. However, if anyone should, say that you can’t attend them all because the loss of these little angels takes such a heavy toll on your heart. It’s the truth.

DEAR ABBY: My late wife passed away two years ago. We always had a dog in our house. He died a year ago. I now have a new lady love in my life, but she doesn’t want a pet in her house. I’m dying to have another dog, and I don’t know what to do. Please advise. — PETLESS IN TEXAS

DEAR PETLESS: Eligible widowers are a prized commodity. If your idea of happiness is having a house dog, find yourself a lady who loves animals as you do. It shouldn’t be difficult.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

Good advice for everyone — teens to seniors — is in “The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It.” To order, send your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $7 to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Shipping and handling are included in the price.)

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