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T’is the Season to Get Stressed Out! Making Holiday Stress Manageable

Making Holiday Stress Manageable

WHEELING — How do you deal with the hassles of the holiday season? Do you channel super-human strength or do you have a colossal meltdown when the pressures of home and work reach a critical point?

Well, the good news is that you don’t have to respond like Superwoman or Clark Griswold to holiday challenges. A middle ground exists between those extremes. Finding that zone can mean success in seasonal celebrations without compromising your health and well-being.

Susan Vasey, a certified trainer and certified specialist in fitness nutrition and exercise therapy, presented a timely session for West Virginia Northern Community College’s No Stigma Attached Lunch and Learn series on the Wheeling campus Thursday. The topic, “Managing Holiday Stress,” focused on maintaining overall health through the holidays.

Vasey offered three rules to remember during the holidays, but added that the tips are beneficial to practice throughout the year. Her three rules for holiday health are as follows:

∫ If it hurts, STOP.

∫ If you’re not having fun, it’s not worth it.

∫ When someone says, “You’re amazing,” your answer is “We know!”

She observed that if an activity or task causes anxiety or stress, one should re-evaluate the handling of such situations. A practice that results in mental distress is not worth continuing.

“If you’re doing something and you are absolutely miserable, why are you doing that?” the speaker asked the audience. “Life is too short to be miserable,” she added.

In terms of healthy eating over the holidays, she cautioned against eating until one is uncomfortable. She quipped that her daughter has a shirt with the message “Gobble Till You Wobble,” but noted that it is not a good dietary philosophy.

Instead, the trainer recommended getting a plan ready for nutrition over the festive season. She suggested eating a breakfast that includes protein, such as eggs, and doing a workout before lunch or dinner. “You’re not as hungry after you work out,” she said.

To control intake of food at a party or dinner, “plan on getting a small portion of everything you want,” she said. “Pick your favorite dessert, but half of what you usually take.”

Also, take time while eating so that the stomach and brain can be in sync for proper digestion and signaling when you are full.

“Limit soda and alcohol. Those are a lot of empty calories,” she said. To avoid overindulging at a celebration, try a liquid “sandwich” of drinking water between consumption of high-caloric beverages.

Contrary to popular belief, the two big holiday meals — Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner — don’t account for seasonal weight gain. The real culprit, according to Vasey, is mindless consumption of tempting treats such as candy and cookies throughout the season.

To curb an appetite for goodies and to remove temptation, she offered these suggestions:

∫ Keep fresh fruits and veggies available for a quick snack.

∫ Make sweets more difficult to get than the healthy options.

∫ Schedule exercise. “You need that plan of action to make sure you get it done.”

∫ Find a friend to keep you accountable. “Workout buddies are the best.”

∫ Ask about special rates at gyms.

∫ Don’t use the excuse that you can’t get to a gym, Explore workout suggestions or videos on Pinterest or YouTube.

∫ Brush your teeth early in the evening to eliminate the temptation of eating or drinking later at night.

Consistency is crucial to fostering physical fitness. Vasey, who serves as an instructor at Hudson Premier Fitness, the YMCA and the Rejuvenation Center, said that while recovering from illness, “For me, what kept me going was teaching classes.”

She told the audience, “Find something your body can do. Schedule that walk; schedule that time. It’s going to become a habit.”

Discussing mental well-being, Vasey said pressures of the holidays can become stress-inducing, while winter is the worst time of year for depression or Seasonal Affective Disorder.

“Let go of what you can’t do. No one is Superwoman,” she said. “Not everybody can get everything done early. Don’t think everything has to be perfect.”

For instance, people may think that they have to create the Christmas card photos in which families are smiling happily and wearing perfect, matching holiday outfits. “That’s a rare unicorn moment,” Vasey remarked wryly.

To avoid becoming over-stressed, “ask for help. Everyone thinks they can do everything for themselves,” she said.

Likewise, she added, “If you see someone who is overwhelmed, ask if they need help.”

Offering another important piece of advice, she said, “Learn to say ‘no.’ We can’t all do everything we want to do. We’re all going to do the best we can … Try your best not to let everything build up at once.”

Last Christmas, when Vasey was recovering from chemotherapy and surgeries for breast cancer, she realized that she couldn’t afford to become stressed by holiday-related calamities. “Take a step back. Is it really worth it?” she asked.

According to the fitness trainer, elimininating stress is beneficial for multiple reasons. “The less stress you have, the less hormones get released and the less weight you’ll gain,” she said.

Although it is meant to be a season of joy, expectations for the holidays can exacerbate family issues. Vasey, who has children and a stepchild, said Christmas can become a time of competition between family units. Managing the holidays requires compromise, cooperation and communication, particularly when multiple households are involved.

Noting that arrangements may not please everyone in the family, she said accommodating others’ needs and interests may necessitate taking a step back and putting one’s own desires aside for the good of the children. “Everything is not going to be perfect. Just go with the flow,” she said.

Adult children who don’t accept their parents’ divorces may create holiday tension among family members. Having patience and not responding to anger with anger can be “the hardest part” to handle in these situations, she observed.

To deal with familial pettiness over the holidays, Vasey suggested sitting down with older children, teenagers and adult children to say “I’m doing the best I can,” then asking the children to name activities that they would like to pursue with their parents.

“Let them know you love the family members the same. You can’t perpetuate that cycle (of pettiness),” she added.

Faced with others’ stress, Vasey said, “I like to put myself in my own little world. Music is my thing. I’ll hum it to myself … I’ll take a step back.”

Holidays can be extremely stressful if family members suffer from Alzheimer’s disease or other forms of dementia. Noting that “a lot of patience” is necessary, she said, “Focus on the positive of what they can do and go with that more than anything.”

When a loved one has died, survivors may feel an overwhelming sense of loss, especially during the holiday season. “That first year is the hardest to get through,” she said.

After a loss, she recommends focusing on good memories that were shared with the loved one. When Vasey’s grandmother died a week before Christmas, she said, “That first year, I wrote down all the things I remembered. I put it in an envelope and put it away.”

Every year afterward, she has opened the envelope and reflected on her memories. “This is my routine,” she said. “It helps tremendously.”

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