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Words Intended To Comfort Only Trigger Man’s Grief

DEAR ABBY: My wife died unexpectedly two years ago, after 18 years of a happy marriage and two kids. While we are doing as well as can be expected, one thing seems to set my grief off. It’s when someone refers to my life as my “new normal.” I’m not sure I can put my finger on why this phrase bothers me so much, but if I had to guess, it’s because I suspect people are using it to hint that it’s time I moved on. Why is it that people who would be deeply offended if I attempted to tell them what to do with their life, seem to think it’s acceptable to imply that I have ...

Obesity Is a Contributing Factor in a Host of Medical Issues

DEAR DR. ROACH: We have been hearing for quite a while about the health risks of obesity, and these have become of even greater concern given the pandemic. The discussion usually involves connecting the higher risk to various medical problems obese people frequently have — for instance, high blood pressure, diabetes and heart disease. I have been obese all my life and generally not had those problems, so I always find myself asking if I have the same increased risks. I see my physician regularly and until age 60 had no medical problems. At 60, I developed high blood pressure that is ...

Presence of New Girlfriend Causes Added Pain For Ex

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend of two years, “Kevin,” recently broke up with me. We’ve had problems in the past about me lying to him or withholding information. I didn’t lie because I’m an awful person. I lied because he had high expectations of me, and I didn’t want to be a disappointment. He is truly the first person I have loved unconditionally since the breakup with my child’s father five years ago. Kevin and I are still friends — sometimes with benefits — but he has moved on to another woman. I’m heartbroken, and it has taken a toll on me. When I visited him the ...

Decisions, Decisions!

The Coronavirus Disease 2019 (COVID-19) pandemic has posed difficult decision making challenges for us as individuals as well as professionals and policy makers. Should the schools reopen? Should I send my children back to school if they do open? Should I go to my doctor or dentist office appointment? Should I have that mammogram or colonoscopy? Should I go to the barber shop or hair salon? Should meat-packing plants, movie theaters, amusement parks and other entities open? Should I dine indoors at a restaurant? When is it safe to shop for clothing or groceries, ride the bus or ...

Soak or Drip? Watering Advice For the Hot Season

August is the month for two garden W’s: weeding and watering. Regular attention to both keeps a vegetable or flower garden pretty and productive well into autumn. For now, let’s look at watering. It’s not necessarily less rain that makes soils drier in August; it’s August’s ...

Favorite Creole Roast Recipe

Dear Heloise: Having to stay at home more these past few months, we’ve been grilling more. I hear you have a recipe for grilling beef tenderloin, my favorite cut of meat. I’d like to give it a try. Will you please print that recipe? — Tommy in Arkansas Tommy, I have a wonderful recipe for beef tenderloin that’s sure to please! You’ll need for Creole Roast: 2 to 2 1/2 pounds of beef tenderloin 1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce 1 tablespoon snipped parsley or 1/2 to 1 teaspoon dried parsley flakes 1/2 teaspoon salt 1/2 teaspoon pepper 1/4 teaspoon celery seed ...